- Emma Bainbridge
- Feb 12
- 3 min read
You may have heard the term 'regulation' when talking about a child's emotions, or their behaviour.
This term is getting really common online, with a lot of people mentioning the importance of thinking about your child’s regulation, or offering tips for managing it, but what does it really mean?
Regulation is the ability to manage our levels of alertness, behaviour, and responses across different situations. For example, our ability to keep calm if someone cuts us off in traffic or maintain our concentration during a tedious task at work.
In some situations, we’re able to manage this on our own, usually because we’ve developed strategies to help us change how we are feeling. In the examples above you might vocalise your disgust at the other driver even in an empty car with nobody to hear you or you might play music to keep your brain engaged while you are working.
In other situations, we rely on other people to support us through something called co-regulation.
You might ask for a hug from your significant other after a hard day. The important thing to keep in mind is that regulation often requires tools you pick up during your life, but it also frequently involves other people even when you’re an adult.
It should be no surprise, that children experience some very big emotions and don’t have the skills to manage them on with on their own. Many of the behaviours you see from children are their responses to those feelings and situations, which can include anger, excitement, frustration, tiredness or anxiety.
Children rely on the adults and their friends to help regulate and support the development of their self-regulation skills. The development of these skills takes time and requires modelling and practice.
You may have seen a young child offer a hug to a crying friend, for example, typically this is a modelled behaviour from a caregiver who comforted them in a similar way!
For children who are experiencing sensory processing challenges, this can be more difficult. Too much sensory information, unexpected events or changes within the environment can lead to meltdowns or withdrawal from situations simply because they don't have the tools to regulate what can feel like overwhelming sensations.
Sensory over-responsivity
Children with an over-responsive sensory system can quickly become overwhelmed, for example because noises that many of us can ignore seem extremely loud or distracting, or because their clothes feel unbearably uncomfortable. You may a child holding their ears when they hear loud or unpredictable noise, or refusing to wear socks or shoes.
Sensory under-responsivity
Children who do not get enough sensory information to meet their needs are under-responsive, and they may not notice sensations or seek additional sensory information. You may see a child who doesn’t get a lot of input from their movement (vestibular) system struggling to sit still.
Clearly, how your child is processing sensory input can have a huge impact on their regulation, and that’s where I come in. By assessing your child’s situation and behaviours, I can work with you to create strategies that provide the sensory input needed to better regulate their system, as well as coming up with independent and co-regulation strategies they can use to feel better during the day.
If you're not sure why some daily situations cause your child to feel overwhelmed, or why your child often acts in a way that’s difficult to explain, get in touch and we’ll work together to create a plan to help your child feel more centred, calmer, and ready to learn or play.
You can contact me on hello@tinystridesot.com or click on the link below for more information about the sensory assessment package.
